You know you’re bored when you finally find an article in your apartment that you’ve been (thinking about) searching for FOR YEARS. 🙂 I finally found this blurb in my old copy of the 100th anniversary issue of Wizard magazine, published eight years ago. Something to think about while we’re all enjoying “Hancock.”  🙂

Black Power!

Ten easy steps for making a genuine stereotypical, borderline offensive, 1970s Black superhero.

1. BLACK IS BEAUTIFUL! Make them Black. Seems obvious, but nobody included that on the memo for “Blackhawk,” and look where that went.

2. ALWAYS BET ON BLACK  The character MUST be called “Black” something, like Black Goliath, Black Lightning, Black Panther, etc., to offset how all the white heroes’ names start with “white,” like…..uh……..

 3. DRESS FOR SUCCESS  When designing the costume, pepper freely with high collars, plunging V-necks and chains. And the Afro’s a must.

4. TALK THE TALK  Aside from a healthy dose of “jive turkey” and “brotha,” give your new crimefighter a believable ethnic catch phrase, like “Sweet Christmas.”

 5. WALK THE WALK  Make ’em good and angry, so they’ll lash out at billboards and fences and stuff when they’re talking to themselves.

 

6. UP WITH PEOPLE  Unlike guys like Superman and Aquaman, they’re one of the people. Have the grocer give him an apple when he walks by.

7. STAY GOLDEN  He might act all tough and grouchy, but beneath that hairy, V-necked chest beats a heart of gold. Unless The Man gets in his way, that is.

8. DO THE TIME  Give him a criminal background, just like Superma…uh, no, like Batma…er, no, bad example. Like Iron M–ah, maybe we should move on to #9.

9. SLUM IT UP  These guys are rarely members of the Avengers and JLA. They’re more likely private investigators, ex-thugs for hire, social workers, stuff like that.

10. FUBU  The stories have to have the air of authenticity to them: the situations the characters find themselves in because of who they are, their day-to-day problems and struggles they must hear. You need somebody who can relate to these issues. Get somebody white to write it.

Copyright (c) 2000 by Wizard magazine.

P.S. For more on Black superheroes, you should check out this and this and this.

2010 UPDATE: Enjoyed reading this.